end of semester anxiety

As the weather gets colder and I get home from vacation (back to life - back to reality), I can't help but get overwhelmed with the end of the semester. Brenton tries to be encouraging by telling me this is my  last fall semester but that doesn't exactly check things off of my to-do list. Because I was told about all my final projects and exams before we left for Mexico, by the time I got home, I forgot everything that I needed to do. 

I am the type of person who writes down everything. I live by my day planner and if something is not in it, I will forget. I may be organized, but I can be sort of absent minded.  Lately I have been laying in bed, unable to sleep, thinking I forgot to write something in my planner.

Its hard not to get frustrated with my professors (here comes my soap box) when they randomly decide to add things to my to-do list simply because they want to. Not because we need more points or have time to kill before the end of the semester, but because they want to. So now, on top of a huge group project, I now have a final exam in my PR class. (I'll get off my soap box now.)

It's my personality to experience anxiety. I experience it often and for many different reasons. Some of the reasons are irrational like someone is going to break into my home solely to kill me. Any who, the only way I have learned to combat these overwhelming thoughts is with prayer and scripture. My go to verses lately have been:

"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?" - Matthew 6:25-27

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made know to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." - Philippians 4:6-7

"Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." - James 4:7-8

This last scripture from James has stuck with me the most. Satan knows exactly how to attack my mind and emotions, and a lot of the time, I let him win. If I can take a breath and pray about my current situation, I draw near to God, and this typically solves my problem. I have to trust that God has already planned everything out for me... even the small details like tests and projects. There is a reason and purpose to everything and I have to remind myself of this often. I have to trust that when I do all that I can do, God will pick up the slack and help me through. Or the words of my best friend Jill "If you try your hardest and do your work, you cannot fail, and you will be just fine."

So, if you are also a worry wart like me, take comfort in knowing you are not alone, but even more so that you have a heavenly father who is one step ahead of you every step of the way. Try your hardest and you will be fine. (and now I need to take my own advice!)

No one can pray and worry at the same time - Max Lucado

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