being me. and being ok with it.

I'll be honest, I struggle with comparison. And I am going to guess that I am not the only one. I often tell myself, "why didn't I think of that?" I'm not creative enough, skinny enough, stylish enough... whatever. I think part of this has to do with the fact I am still rather confused about my personal style. I love trying new things and it seems like what I think is cute (clothing, decor, colors, etc.) is short lived before I move on to the next. I am all over the place, I love it all. I love vintage, but I also love a little mix of modern. I like a little bit of sparkle but I also enjoy simplicity. As you can tell, I am struggling to define my personal style. This then leads to comparing myself to others and trying to find my identity in something that doesn't really fit me (just because it fits someone else, it doesn't mean it will fit me).

I keep trying to change and mold myself into something and hope that I like the finished product. 

I read ahead an extra day in my Jesus Calling devotional and read this:
"You make a practice of judging yourself, based on how you look or behave or feel. If you like what you see in the mirror, you feel a bit more worthy of My Love. When things are going smoothly and your performance seems adequate, you find it easier to believe you are my beloved child. When you feel discouraged, you tend to look inward so you can correct whatever is wrong. Instead of trying to fix yourself, fix your gaze on me, the Lover of your soul. Rather than using your energy to judge yourself, redirect it to praising Me. Remember that I see you clothed in My righteousness, radiant in My perfect Love" - Jesus Calling, July 13

Thank you Jesus. Thank you for breaking right through that wall and speaking directly to me. God created me, to be me, and no one else. My prayer is that, through prayer and time in the Word, that I will finally discover who I am meant to be. But I also need to remember, the only thing that needs to define me, is that I am a beloved child and follower of Christ. 

For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ - Galatians 1:10

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